Fruitful Life

We, as humans, have this ridiculous habit of being unsatisfactory, whatever we have. We don’t value much the things we already have in our hands. And as an Indian, I know our priorities in life are way different than those in the west. We work for family, we live for family or kids, and after retirement, we live taking care of our grand children. I think it will take that retirement stage at least to understand that we had achieved much thing in our life.

Last day me and Lays were talking over a coffee and were of course comparing our lives with other friends. How they have built a new home, and we still live in an rented apartment. How they have good jobs, and we hadn’t achieved anything in life so far.. blah blah blah. Then I told her the classic dialogue I heard from a younger Vietnamese guy, who is working as an apprentice in my company. We used to go for break together, and talk about the entire different cultures. He being born and brought up in Germany, knows two different culture, mighty German and fighting Vietnamese. He was very interested in Indian culture though.

So one day he was asking about my family, and surprised to know that I have two boys already and a job as a consultant, at the age of 34! He was 30, living alone with no partner and an apprentice job. He told me “Waaoh, your life is so settled! You had achieved all the things in this age!”. That made me think, yeah, its true. Getting married and having two kids with a stable job to pay off, should be called as the fully achieved life. But here we are still thinking, we need to make a home, teach children, get retired, all those futuristic concerns.

Why can’t we understand or think of what we achieve in our life so far and lead a relaxed life. Why can’t I think like how my friend thought about me. The definition of fruitful life, should be changed to, “the life that we hadn’t achieved so far”! Peace Out!

Too far… Too near…

They sat across the Coffee table, two cups of Caffè Mocha remained in front of them steaming and untouched. Barista cafe across the office was their favorite meeting place outside office. They used to be more than colleagues in the office. They shared an unique bond between each other, lots of common passion and interest which made them close to each other.

Things were quite normal till couple of days before. They used to talk to each other and spend lots of time together and didn’t felt any odd in that, since they thought they were true friends. The truth hit them late, with a bang, that they were more than friends.

After lots of struggle they end up back in the cafe, facing each other. Everything, including the coffee, remained the same except one thing. They were no longer able to look into each others eyes and speak.

“May the love hidden deep inside your heart find the love waiting in your dreams. May the laughter that you find in your tomorrow wipe away the pain you find in your yesterdays.”

Rain, My Best Friend

While writing this post, rain is blasting outside my balcony. Its been quite long time, might be 3 months, since it had rained. And don’t know how much I had longed for one. Because, from the time I remember, rain has been my best friend, my first lover for sure.

In my parents’ house I had the room, which opens the window to the open terrace, and I used to watch the rain through the window, don’t know how long. The rain drop tripping over my face, sometimes rough, sometimes smooth. I always loved the feeling.

I don’t know how many people will be out there like me, who loved rain like this. May be since I am born and living in Kerala, where the monsoon starts. I remember one good friend of mine giving me a present, “Kerala, where the rain was born”. My friend knows me very much, that I love the rain.

I had a concept home, where I will have a balcony, cozy or big, but I want to spent my retirement in that home, having a coffee along a good book and the rain drops still dripping over my face.

Rain, my dear friend, I love you very much. Keep visiting me!

An unforgettable journey to the end of the world – Rameshwaram

So a long pending journey. A trip to Rameshwaram or to Dhanushkodi. I had been to Rameshwaram during 1999, for spreading the ashes of my grand mother. But it was a quick journey that we spend hardly half a day there, and couldn’t go to the Dhanushkodi. Since then it was a long dream to visit there again, and it took 16 years to make it true. The idea of the trip came up all of a sudden, when I was talking with one of my childhood friend, Kittu, and he told that he along with my other childhood friends are planning for a trip, may to Rameshwaram. I pushed myself immediately into the trip plan and within a week, everything was set. Initial plan was to go by train. From Trivandrum take the train till Nagercoil and from Nagercoil take the Kanyakumari Rameswaram express which reaches Nagercoil at 10:23. And the train travels overnight and reaches Rameshwaram at around 5:30 in the morning, which sounds perfect. But later two of our friends dropped out and we became 5 in number and so cancelled the train and decided to go by my car, which I think was the best decision we took. This was the route we took. Wondered how we were living before the age of GPS maps. 😀 Capture So the trip started on Saturday 23rd May 2015, 3:00 AM, from my house. We were 5, me, Rajesh, Kittu, Prasad and Vishnu. Rajesh and Vishnu knows driving and so they were the backup driver. After filling a full tank of petrol we started through the narrow “National Highway” connecting Trivandrum and Nagercoil and we reached Nagercoil around 4.15AM. After having a early morning tea we sped through the highway, which is a real highway towards Tirunelveli. Just before reaching Tirunelveli, take the right towards Tuticorin, yet another highway and from Tuticorin take left towards East Coast Road. A fellow advice to anyone who is travelling through here, carry something to eat with you, or have something from Nagercoil or otherwise get into Tutucorin city to have something. Otherwise you will sit hungry like us till Rameswaram. 😀 The East coast road, which apparently takes to Chennai is a nice road, not so wide, a two line road, which runs along the coast. Though you cannot see the Sea, you can feel the heavy wind and the crouching heat outside. And small villages that may just pop up and out of nowhere, people who still rely on bullock carts. Near Tutucorin you can even see the salt farms around you. But you will definitely love the drive through here. DSC07696 DSC07717 And don’t forget all these routes, except the East coast road are tolled ones and prepare for that as well. The road finally takes us to the great Pamban bridge. It was India’s first sea bridge, and was the longest sea bridge in India until the opening of the Bandra-Worli Sea Link. There are two bridges, one for road and another for rail. And the bridges are nearly 1 KM long through the sea, which looks like two different sea on both sides. One will be rough and other calm. One point of caution : There is an entry toll for the bridge, which is Rs.9 for cars as of today. But the toll people will take more from you telling the board is outdated. So beware of that. You can stop in the bridge and enjoy the sea, the wind and the sun. The rail bridge is for the most part, a conventional bridge resting on concrete piers, but has a double leaf bascule section midway, which can be raised to let ships and barges pass through. DSC07744

After spending nearly 30 mins on the bridge, we drove to the Island. Rameshwaram is an island, which I would say is still undeveloped. It had seen many stories of the Sri Lankan refugees during the times of Sri Lankan war. So because of that you can see huge cut outs or posters of now dead leader of LTTE, Prabhakaran. Also there are LTTE flags everywhere. But Rameshwaram is pretty safe, don’t worry. 🙂

Rameshwaram town is nearly 11 kms after the Pamban bridge, and just before entering the town, you need to pay an entry free, Rameswaram Municipality Entry Fee of Rs.100 as of now. Believe me, that would be the last toll you need to pay. 😀 And from there the congestion of small town starts. We had booked a place to stay before hand so our next task was to find it out. We booked at “Sethu Residency”, a small not too bad lodge, which has AC and TV and charged 800 per room without AC. You wont be needing AC much, since there is wind all the time, that too we went on peak summer.

The town looks very much undeveloped. Later we knew the reason. Even though thousands of people come for pilgrimage, all the revenue, except the 100 rupees municipality entry fee, goes to individuals. Everything is without receipts or bills. There are some quite nice eat out places, mostly veg, AND DONT TRY NON-VEG THERE. The road which leads to the temple is so narrow and its better to leave your car in your hotel or lodge and go by walking, that’s what we did. Rameshwaram-9901_7

You are not allowed to take mobiles or cameras inside the temple, so this would be the last picture from me. Read wikipedia about this temple, and believe me, its worth visiting. Very old temple, built around 1500. On entry, we were greeted by some people looks like guide, and asked for 250 rupees per person including all tickets and queueless darsan of deity. We agreed and proceeded.

The inside of temple is worth seeing, with all those stone works and architecture. Rameshwaram temple has 22 theerthams (wells) and you need to take bath from all these. The guide will pull water using a bucket and pour over us. Each teertham has different significance and the water on each well is different! I would suggest to take this bath to everyone, though it might not be true, the different water in different wells, which are so adjacent to each other is worth seeing. Also these 22 wells are placed in the shape of Ohm.

So after taking bath from all 22, we went inside the temple, (where only hindus are allowed!!!!!!), to have darsan. As promised, nowhere we needed to stand on queue, we had darsan of all deities easily. And we all felt blessed!

Since it was late, we went back to room and planned to go to Dhanushkodi, which is the last tip of India, from where Sri Lanka is just 18 kms through see. Midnight we got an idea and we all hoped into the car and drove back to the Pamban Bridge. One of the best decision we took again, because it was such a great experience. In middle of the bridge, with winds screaming around at 60 kmph, and sound of oceans. Waaoh, we didn’t knew how time flew and we stand there for nearly 1 hour. With a relaxed, peaceful mind we came back to our room.

Next day our jeep driver, whom we booked through the lodge, came early at 6:30. We cant drive our normal cars to Dhanushkodi. Because the last 4 km is pure beach, and only 4 wheel drives can go there. There are lots of such jeeps and mini buses taking people there. You can either catch them from Rameswaram or drive till the beach, and you get mini bus from there. Jeep will be exclusively for us, and he charged 1300 for 5 of us. And I heard the mini bus charges 200 per person from Dhanushkodi. So it was good for us to take the jeep.

Dhanishkodi, is an old ruined town, which got ruined by cyclone or typhoon during 60s. Till then, it was having people living, railway stations, good roads and all. But now they have only remnants of these old buildings. We could see works were going on to renovate it. The road towards Dhanushkodi, 18km, is super. Straight, trees on both sides, beach on both sides, and very few vehicles. After some 14 km, the beach starts and it was a roller coaster ride in the jeep. But it was also fun.

20150524_063319 20150524_070123

20150524_080955_Richtone(HDR)

20150524_080303

Finally after a long roller coaster drive, we reached at one of the best beach I had ever been. If you take top 5 beaches in India, this should be in that. But as I said, like Rameswaram, this is also so undeveloped. But with the new efforts from government, this might come up back to life. The water is so shallow, that we could walk though the water may be upto couple of kilometers. I don’t know exactly, but we could walk till some 500 meters, if you see the boat in the picture, we were on that boat taking pictures. And an advice would be to go there early morning, as I could imagine after 9 it will be crouching sun over there and also get yourself bathed in sun screen before hitting there. There are couple of shacks who sold soda or tender coconut water. Other than that, its a deserted beach. But we spend some quality time there, playing bathing and all.

20150524_070946

It’s believed that, Rama on the way to save Sita from Ravana in Lanka, constructed the bridge from this point towards Sri Lanka. The so-called ‘Adams Bridge’ is still there, but we cannot see that, as it is under the water due to raising level of sea. But satellite images shows these stones. Its made of some floating stones. Though it sounds fantasy, there is a place in Rameswaram, an ashram, where they have saved some 4-5 such stones. They won’t get drowned in the water and just floats. Looks like rock, but it seems to me like some other formation. But still, Dhanushkodi, or Rama Sethu Point, have very much significance in the Hindu Tradition.

With mind full of peacefulness, we returned back to our lodge in our Jeep. Sent the driver off, got ready, had typical Tamil breakfast and started our return journey. Waving good bye to the Pamban bridge, to the toll keepers, to the salt fields of Tutucorin, and through the highway, we drove back home, cutting straight through the heavy wind and sun. Thanks Rameshwaram for such a great trip, unforgettable trip, rejuvenating us with your spirits. You will always be remembered. 🙂

DSC07868

Overcoming Thanatophobia (Fear of Death)

Thanatophobia :  This is the name phobia google suggested me for the feeling I was going through for may be last 3-4 months. Thanks to google to give me the exact word for this. Thanatophobia, means fear of death, or fear of dying. But am not sure this word completely suits the feeling I was going through. Yet it is true that I was undergoing this phobia, wait, I think I still have that underlying somewhere within me.

I am a seasonal Thanatophobian. This started way before when I was 12 or 13 years of old. My granny was 88 years old at that time, and thinking about her was the first time I started fearing death. But somehow I got rid of it, may be after her death. Then it started climbing me again when I was doing my graduation. I used to go for one hardware course after my college and used to get late while coming back. The time waiting for the bus, at the night, alone, brought me the feeling again. Succesfully got rid of that again.

Now I got under the phobia again after Lays had left to her home for her delivery of Totto. 🙂 I was alone in my room, at nights while surfing through facebook, while watching TV, anything, my mind went under the fear of dying. It started after seeing the movie, The Bucket List. After that night, it was very difficult to sleep. Whenever I close my eyes, the fear of death climbed back. Later I found out that its not the death am afraid of, am afraid of getting old and then facing the fact that anypoint from now I will be dead. What will happen after that, is their any soul inside us which will leave, then I am happy. If there is no soul, and death is the end of all, bhum, thats the worst thing that will happen.

I tried to find out the reasons why this phobia came back. The reasons were simple, I was alone, and that too time without sunlight brings weird thoughts into your mind. Day time you will be too busy to think these things. The solution for this was right inside these reasons. Dont get free time at night. Make yourself busy until your eyes tell to that go to sleep idiot.

That was the point when I decided to make my reading habit more strong. I did had this habit, but was not that aggressive. Now I am an aggressive reader. Read till my eyes get burned out and sleep on the book itself. And BINGO, I am surprised that the phobia is not creeping out anymore. I hope any one of you reading this will get some hint to overcome this. Make your mind understand the fact that death is unstoppable, and believe in god. Death is not the end of all, believe that.

But still am sure that Thanatophobia is lying inside me undercover, ready to jump out anytime.

Indian IT Series- Part 1 – Effective Management

After working for nearly five years in the Indian Software Industry, I think its high time I should scribble about some of the findings I made during my career so far. Hopefully this comes as the first part of the series, which I titled as “Indian IT Series”. A foreward to all who may read this :: These writings contain viewpoint from a software developer and its not intended to hurt anyone.

This episode, I am gonna tell my opinion about the Management Tier of this industry. I believe that this is the main tier which have a major impact of the outcome of a company or a project. I think I am not at a level to tell any opinion about the management of a company, rather I would love to explode my thinking on project level management or the level just above that. Fortunately or unfortunately, I had worked under both type of managers : the best and the worst. Also I had undergone two entirely different IT cultures :: restriction oriented and freedom oriented :: Kerala and Bangalore. 🙂

Some DOs that developers expecting from a Manager :

  • Give adequate creative freedom
  • Act as a filter, which filters out the pressure coming from above
  • Appreciate all the good work
  • Understand the capabilities of the developer and stand with them
  • Support them in whatever situations possible
  • Do support them in case they are stretching beyond working hours
  • Be friendly and open
  • Bring maximum transparency to the team
  • Be honest and talk on face
  • Share the responsibilities with your petty developers
  • Try to implement a flexible working hours possible
  • Be an understanding manager
  • Even though any of your member make an error, make them aware of that, train them and give them another oppurtunity.

Some DONTs that developers dont want from a Manager :

  • Don’t bug them frequently by asking the status every 5 minutes
  • Don’t induce un-necessary restrictions, this will change their attitude
  • Don’t involve them in to0 much junk work like process documents and timesheets
  • Don’t fingerpoint your developers
  • Don’t act friendly and then stab on their back
  • Don’t blame your developer in front of an audience and there by humiliating them
  • Don’t question the developers on the time they are spending
  • Don’t force developers to stretch, just explain the need of sitting late.
  • Don’t expect developers to stretch everyday, they are as human as you

These are the points that come from the top of my head. Interestingly, I collected these points from my colleagues and hence I think this is a true expectation from the developers.

Friends

Friends are the biggest asset in our life. How many friends you have, is not more. I love making friendships, literally all over the world, thanks to the social networking sites like Facebook and Orkut.

We can classify friends into seasonal and lifelong friends. The majority of our friends will be seasonal, and I classify almost 80-85% of my friends as seasonal. We go to school, we have some friends. Go to college, we will make new friends and as time passes, the school friends may get erased slowly. From College to work, as usual new friends come and college friends slowly starts disappearing. By this time the old school friends might have vanished.

But what I feel, is the old school friends or the child hood friends will be the life long friends compared to the seasonal friends. During child hood, our minds will be very less exposed to the selfishness and artificiality. Hence the friendships built during that time will be coming direct from the heart. By the passage of time, though these bad things may creep into the mind, but the warmth of that friendship will be lying in some corner of our hearts afresh.

Last week once I was too much screwed down and was feeling all time low. But in between that I found one of my old childhood play friend on the way and believe me the 2 hour spend with him changed my whole day. I realized the value of the old friends and after that I spend much time to find out and get in contact with the lost friends. Once again thanks to Facebook and Orkut for creating a oppurtunity for rejuvenate the lost friendships.

So what are you waiting for, login to your social networking area and get back your old friends, which will make the rest of your life truly valuable.